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Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Storm in Rangitoto and the zombies from the lost city by Caroline

In class, we have been working on placing superheroes into strange settings and turning them into highly descriptive stories. It's been great fun to see how many superheroes pop up in Auckland!

Storm in Rangitoto and the zombies from the lost city

Storm was flying to go to the Avengers,but then something caught the glimpse of her eye,She turned her head to see what is was.It was a secret island,more like a lost Island.She entred this Island and found herself in a little hut.And there was a bed.She was sure tired so she slept then……….
“Who are you?”It was a fairy,it startled Storm so much that she woke up.
“My namre is Storm!I’m sure you’ve heard of me before,right?”SHde asked the fairy.
“Of course not!I have never heard from such person called Storm!”She replied.
“Well are you a superhero?”The fairy asked Storm.
“Yes,I am!”She replied delightedly.


“Really?If you are a superhero then can you please help me and my family and friends?We came to this Island because there were evil zombies coming after us!Can you help us?”Asked the fairy.
“Of course,I was just going to go to the Avengers so,I will go and ask them to help me help you find a better place and help get rid of these zombies you speak of!”She replied.So she went and searched for the Avengers.

Then she finally got to where the Avengers lived.She went to go tell Captain America but when she touched him………
“Ragh Ragh Ragh Ragh ghgyghghghghghghghgh!”It wasn;t Captain America.It was Captain America ZOMBIE!!!!!!!!!
“Captain,why are you a zombie?”But Storm only said that in her head.So she went and got the others but,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,


“RGHRGRHRGRHGRHRGRHRGHRGRHRGRHRGRHRGRHGRRGRJRGRH!”They were zombies too trying to bite the blood out of her body so she went back to the lost city that she was.
“I think that city is Rangitoto!”Storm studied it and it looked exactly the same island.
So she did what she was supposed to do…………..
“Kapow!”A thunder was created by her.It struck the zombies The zombies fell to the ground.She struck and struck until they were dead.

“Hooray!”The fairies were delighted! So they gave her and the Avengers the land to live on.And they were all happy!Well not really…………………………….

“Stomp,stomp,stomp,!”THe fairies and storm heard the stomping coming closer,and closer,and closer.THen……………

By Caroline

Please leave Caroline feedback by clicking on the comment button and sharing your thoughts on her writing.

24 comments:

  1. nice work I like you punctuation but you spelled she wrong you spelled It like SHde but your made me felt like I was there

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  3. I think I still need some editing but yeah.Thanks Caroline(AKA owner)

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  4. nice exclamtion marks but yo spelt THe rong good words and all that

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  5. I like how you used onomatopoeia to describe the storm. It reminds me of the thunder during the night time. Have you ever seen a storm yourself?

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  6. yes but I'm talking about the super heroine Storn

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  7. nice punctuation Caroline really super and the lost city really makes so interesting like will they find the lost city or are they in the lost city you know but nice one Caroline just watch out for the capitals you use and where you put it.

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  8. Thanks Annie for the feed back!

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  9. An exciting story - your use of punctuation makes it even more so! Might have been an idea to read through again to correct typos and use of capitals? Will you write a follow up? I would like to know what happened next!

    from Barbara

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  10. Thank you and I will try to make part 2 for my home work :).

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  11. Thank you and I will try to make part 2 for my home work :).

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  12. I like the way you layed out your story.This remind me when I did a story with zombies in it.But you need to check your spelling mistakes.Are you going to make another one

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  13. Hi,
    I love the detail you used! Maybe next time you could add more to your story! Also remember the punctuation and spelling, That can help you make your story even better!
    Again, Well done!
    From Sharnah.
    Ps: so you can contact me or comment on my blog here is the link.
    http://wissharnahp.blogspot.co.nz/

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  14. Thanks for the feed back Sharnah.

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  15. And Tugi yes I am going to make another one.

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  16. good work i think your poem is very interesting .It makes me fell like I'm eating a banana.Could you use ore adjective?

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    1. I think you are mixed up with another poem but thanks anyways.:)

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  17. I really like your descriptiveness in this story. Pretty please make another one soon!
    Here is the link to my blog:
    wisalex.blogspot.co.nz

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  18. I think your story is wonderful and id like to read it again.Do u think u used heaps of new interesting words?

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  19. I think your story was great!,maybe next time make the story bit shorter but besides that it was lovely!,with the nice speeches that really fitted with the story.

    By:Rachel

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    1. Thanks Rachel.That really means a lot to me,and I know now what to do next time when I do a story but on my blog,I have made the 2nd part of Storm in rangitoto and the zombies form the lost city 2 so yeah.But thank you.
      From:Caroline

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